The View from the Inside

It’s that time of year when Facebook pops up and shows me images of past memories. Pre-pandemic, July was usually my travel month with my cousin – Berlin, Montreal, Chicago, Spain, Italy, Nashville and many others – all reminders of how much I love traveling (and how much I miss her). Pre-pandemic, travel was a legitimate way to escape my daily life and leave my house behind. If I was lost in Meta, Italy, I couldn’t think about my life back home. Pre-pandemic, I was out and about, changing my view of the external world.

Now, after eighteen months of huddling inside my house, my view has changed dramatically. In fact, I’ve become a bit fixated on the view from inside my house. It’s driven a huge desire to re-nest and from what I can tell, I don’t think I’m alone in this feeling.

It all started with my living room lamps. [Note: Back in my theater career, I was an occasional light designer, so I’m pretty picky about lighting.] After months of hunkering down under dingy old lamps, it was time for a change.

Thank God for online returns because my room soon filled with a variety of lamps that garnered commentary from my sons.

“It looks like a duck’s butt, mom.”

“It’s a flower,” I reply.

His head see-saws back and forth trying new perspectives. He struggles to edit his retort and gives up.

“Nope, still a duck’s butt.”

For those of you that know me, I would never have an animal’s anatomy on display in my living room. So, not a duck’s butt.

My other son offered his opinion.

“I can’t get past the flowery thing.”

(Sigh)

Lesson learned? Don’t ask my adult sons for interior design advice.

Undaunted, I carried on. New lamps and a brighter ceiling fixture shed light on the carpet stains, dirty window blinds and old paint. Obviously, those needed to be replaced.

And the artwork on the wall was from last century, so hours of online surfing yielded a dizzying array of possible wall art printouts taped to the walls.

A rearrangement of bookshelves created the need for new chairs . . .

Yes, my simple “refresh” turned into a complete overhaul.

And I didn’t stop there.

Seeking refuge from the living room chaos, I became fixated on the view of my garden from both the kitchen and office windows.

After multiple trips to the nursery, I now have new flowers that only I can see from the inside of my house. And I’m currently contemplating a fairy garden outside my living room window. Stay tuned!

Throughout this process of re-nesting, I was reminded of my cancer surgeon who repeatedly and doggedly counseled me to be patient. Her mantra – healing comes from the inside out – echoes through my heart. I feel like I’m healing part of the pain from the last year by creating a fresh start and a healthy environment in which to emerge anew.

It’s now time to invite others to come enjoy my new view. Wishing you all a healthy and happy re-nesting.